The Girl Child..

*Disclaimer – This post doesn’t intend to hurt any person of any religion. What I wrote are my personal thoughts, and not meant to hurt anybody*

So it happens,
I am sitting in the lounge of an operation theatre.
A family of four, seeminly educated, and well dressed, is sitting next to me, waiting for an update for their loved ones inside. I have no idea, what surgery is going on for them.
They seem tensed.
Constantly hawking at the doors, asking anybody who comes through those doors, for an update.
*Time passes*
A worker comes by and says something to a member of that family, and they rejoice.
It was satisfying to see people joyous, rejoicing at something, hugging each other to express their feelings.
I felt happy, and Prayed for them in my heart somewhere.

A man from among them, then suddenly turns, dials a number and shouts through the phone, “It’s a boy!!!!, I would have been devastated if it would have been a girl!”

My heart sank hearing that, I felt heart broken, I was the only girl sitting there, and it felt like a personal attack to me, I don’t know why.

I would have been happy if it was a boy for them, or even a girl. I don’t care about the gender, but them being this stereotypical, and gender biased, hurt my core.
I can’t explain how broken I felt, and at the same time how furious I was.
My eyes were teary, looking at the society that doesn’t even accept the existence of a girl happily.
Sad.

I was always rejoiced by my family. I remember my Mum telling, when I was born, My father was elated, more than he was when my brother was born. And true to his actions, he loved all of us, but always more attached, and more loving for me.
He always said,
“In my religion, it is said that the Girl child is a GIFT from God himself, and that we bring DOUBLE the Rehmah’ (Blessings/Mercy of God) when we come into this world, than a boy!, and So I believe.”

And so I was raised the same. With all the more affection, love, pampering, from my parents, and siblings too. Alhumdulillah.
Atleast the fact that I don’t have to face it on my personal front, gives me satisfaction that some parts of the society isn’t having issues with ‘The Girl Child’.
I pray it improves.

-Aahilic Aish

Thought Dumplings.

I have lately had time to ponder on things. I must say though, the thoughts I have when I am angry or pissed at something, or someone are way more factually correct, than when I am sane.

My dad always said, “If given a choice between marrying the person you love, and the person who loves you, choose the one who loves you. For the one you love may/not love you back, or care for you, or reciprocate at all. On the other hand, the person who loves you truly, will not just care but respect, and love you in ways unimagined. And on staying neutral, someday you will fall for them too.”

Fast forward to today’s scenario, and I notice most people falling in love with those who don’t love them back. And those people who don’t love these back, in turn, fall for some other 3rd person who are emotionally unavailable for them.

Re-read. Let that sink in.

This vicious cycle continues, producing more and more emotionally drained, and emotionally unavailable ‘deads’ as I’d like to call them.

When, or rather How did Loving Someone get so Hard?

What is the solution? How does the cycle break?

You’ll find me constantly wondering (or rather overthinking) this, these days.

-Aahilic Aish

Beauty Of Being A Mess.

You realize many things when you are a mess.

Many conclusions can be made from it, which other wise are difficult to be dealt with.

Every body can handle you when you are happy, and all sorted, and know where you are going with your life.

You know who deserves special seats in our life? 

People who know when you are a mess, and still choose to stay with you, amd cry with you, rather than enjoying, and getting wasted in some party.

Very few people, come into our lives that way, who choose to stay, even when we push them away, people who come back, no matter how many times we have to shoo them away from us, and lock ourselves in some dark corners. They shine bright like light, and fill up our darkness, and that’s light peeks like a ray of hope, when there seems none.

It’s beautiful being a mess, and it’s more importantly a better life lesson, than any other state of mind.

-Aahilic Aish

So never mind, being a mess, and cut a slack to your self, and to the people who deserves your love, in a true manner.

-AahilicAish