The consequences of loving you unconditionally..

Its amazing the amount of love I hold for you!
And its even more crazy that you can hurt me in million more ways than that.

It’s true, the more you love, greater is your capacity to get hurt from the same person. I love you unconditionally, and I keep getting hurt in ways unimaginable.

But there’s silver lining to the cloud if you think of it that way, atleast there’ll be a day when the wound will finally become a canker sore, and then maybe, even if I get hurt, it won’t be painful anymore?

I dont know what I’ll do with all the love I hold for you.
You don’t let me to express my love, or shower it on you, I cant keep it to myself, all this is slowly, very slowly killing me, the me that I am.

My life is such, I guess. When I chose to love you, I didn’t know my own depths, to love, to get hurt, to tolerate, and to still be madly in love with you.

The constant pain is a slow poison working its way to kill me.
I guess it’s better, tho! Someday, once and for all, I’ll be done with love. I hope.

Sometimes, I want to push u away, so bad, just so you value me better, but then I just leave it to it. Can’t even see a scratch on you, I won’t be able to hurt you with that.
I don’t know how much more my heart can take, before giving up, totally. Let’s see how bad that bitch is!

And to think, you have zero idea of the hurt you cause. Must be some kind of a blessing.
I’ll always choose happiness for you, tho.

So, in a way. It’s good.

But if given, in a parallel world, I would love to be loved by you unconditionally.

-Aahilic Aish

True love, sometimes.

True love sometimes doesn’t look like walking hands in hands with each other.

True love sometimes doesn’t look like going on coffee dates together, hanging out together.

True love sometimes doesn’t look like reading romantic novels together or going on shopping spree together.

True love sometimes isn’t going to the beaches to watch sunsets together.

Sometimes,
True love is watching the one we love, rest their head on the shoulder of the person they love.

-Aahilic Aish

And you stand there, and smile.

Smile, knowing it’ll never be you.

Smile, knowing they are happy with somebody else.

Smile, knowing their happiness matters the most.

Smile, knowing they can never be yours, but you’ll always be theirs.

Always.

-Aahilic Aish

The kind of love i wouldn’t mind waiting for, all my life…

When i say you mean the world to me, i MEAN it. I’ll share everything with you. My life will revolve around you. There are no secrets between us. No gifts, no luxuries. Let’s do stuff together. Lets sit amd laugh at/with each other. Let’s get out in the sun, sit on the ledge, and talk for hours about everything, and nothing. Let’s just sit peacefully in each other’s company. Let’s enjoy our own spaces.
Just you. Me. A simple, forever together kind of love.
I’ll be the most childish, illogical one. But also the most understanding. I’ll be your guide, supporter, your critique, your pillow of support. You wana shout, I’m here. You wana fight, I’m here. You need love, I’m here. You tell me, i do it. No questions asked. No judgement, hatred, jealousy, grudge, or letting anybody come in between us. It’ll always be about Trust, Love, Faith, Honesty, and Transparency. Let’s support each other. Let’s be happy together. Let’s smile together, Let’s be positive, Let’s grow together, and be each other’s , and own’s best friend. Let’s bring out the best in each other, and us.
That’s love, for me.
Whatever it is, i know I’ll give my 100% in it, for you. But when i do that, i expect the same ’cause i am not gonna lower my standards for anybody who comes along the way claiming to love me, and trash me on their way out. No! Stay away.

It’s simple.

If You love Me, I love You.

-Aahilic Aish…

If You love Me, I love You.
-Aahilic Aish

A Maiden Wish…

Once in my life time, i want to fall in love, true love,
not the so-so ordinary one.

Doesn’t matter if we can’t stay together or if we dont have a very long future together, may be a short one, but definitely a true one.

I want that guy to be so special in my ordinary life.
Someone who understands me as i am, not try to change me for anybody, or anything.
someone who accepts me for who i am, who is really proud to have me.

Not big things, but smaller ones, where he misses me when i am not present in his environment.
Where he randomly texts me ‘take care’, ‘reach and text’, ‘hope your day is fine’, and sometimes, ‘i miss you’.

I crave romance in the most minute of things, him listening to my all day banter with a bigggg smile on his face, respecting me enough to let me fly free and possessive enough to fly with me in the whole of the sky.

-Aahilic Aish

I want him to truly respect me for what and who i am, whatever i am.

Understands before i even have to speak.
Smiles at me, shows random gestures of kindness, makes my really bad day, a good one, by lending me an ear.

Laughs with me, enjoys my madness, my idiotic dance in my pjs, loves my weirdest looks, and still calls me beautiful.
Completes my sentences; understanding level? infinite..

Takes cover for me, encourages me, backs me up, always.

Someone who never shows me his temper, yet shares each sec of his day with me, makes me understand things i am confused at with all his patience, someone who is never fed up of me, who knows when i need encouragement, & when i need a back up.

somebody who sings me ”tu jaan h, armaan h, soniyo, etc” when i dont fall asleep, midnight. Someone who caresses my cheeks, and plays with my hair.

No biggy dates, home made food may be, but, of course, feeds me with his hands, and takes care of me like i am small kid, makes me laugh, tells me random stories when i am not sleepy, and teases me when i act childish.

Someone who takes effort to be with me.
I know am not beautiful or such sorts but i want him to look at me like my eyes holds stories he wants to listen to, like my smile erases his pains, and my voice calms his soul, and my absence makes him restless.

I won’t mind even if this kinda relationship lasts a small period of time, but i should have that confidence that it WAS and IS a true love, and that we will respect each other and love each other and pray for each other’s happiness even when we aren’t together. Share the same amount of love, and understanding.

Trust level? peaks!! I don’t need him to tattoo my name, or exchange passwords, or look into my phone stealthily, no rings, like just no need, i should know, no matter what, he won’t cheat on me, or betray my trust, ever.

short lasting? No problem, but, i want to experience this, atleast once in my life time.

Too much a fairytale?

may be… but

that’s My fairytale!

Why?

’cause i am willing to do all this, if anybody can really reciprocate it towards me.

-Aahilic Aish