Yes, two most controversial things.
Being a muslim, and being a girl child.
Based on true events.
I recently met this person, i wouldn’t go by their religion because i personally feel religions don’t make good or bad people, their company, and their perspectives about things, and people do.
I am a person who loves my own company, and so this night, in this party, i met someone after a very long time, and well the first shit that comes outta their mouth ( i don’t wanna specify their gender either) was, “So, you have become a practicing muslim, i see”, i was appalled, and i just nodded a yes.
“How can you practice islam, its so offending, and oppressive for women especially, and muslim parents are so strict, you have no own choices, you have to cover your self, always, you can’t be in relationship, you can’t have guy friends” they blasted off.
And i just stood there, thinking of how ignorant the human race can be. Like, dude, just look at me do i look oppressed?
So i ask, “What made you think i am oppressed?”
And they go about the looooong list of things. First, as expected, was my hijab. Trust me, i am FED up of explaining to people, that Hijab is my choice, and my parents never forced me for it. And like how diamonds are precious, and are to be protected, and not left exposed out to the world, i wear hijab because i am precious, not affordable by everyone. And who said my religion doesn’t allow us to choose our own partner, in fact my religion says, “the best thing for two people in love, is to get married”. Yeah, you heard it right, we can choose people we want to marry, we can fall in love too, just not in the wrong kind of love. The love we have is pure, untouched.
And about the freedom, as a girl child, i was given more freedom than most of the girls i know of. And more freedom than my brothers ever had at the same age as me, infact.
For example, i learnt how to drive when i was in my 7th grade, whereas my brothers, in their 10th and 9th grade. I was allowed to travel alone, at nights too, even in my teenage, when most of my friends were not allowed beyond 9 or 10. Infact my brothers had a time limit too, but me, never. But i was made to have a sense of responsibility, so i chose to not be a night party owl, i wasn’t oppressed for it. My dad trusted me, he taught me to think of all the pros and cons before taking my OWN decisions, he never slapped his decisions on me, neither did he let anyone. I was moulded to think of good, the bad, for myself, and how any of my decisions could affect me or somebody else, and after pondering about it, it was always made sure that I take a decision, and also it’s responsibility if something goes wrong. I was never spoon fed, but i was made to learn to feed myself, so i don’t depend on anyone. Even today, i clearly remember discussing everything with my father. Everything, inclusive of topics like the “male friends”, to say the least. And i was never judged. My parents loved me so much, that i never felt the need to search love, outside, in this world. I never felt the need to be in a relationship to crave the love people crave, for they are deprived of the love, the love their parents could never give, and hence search the same in some guy/a girl. May be that’s why i know, even though i never fell in love, i know if and when i am in love, i know what to look upto, and what to expect, i am truly a romantic, indeed. :))
My dad set the standard too high for this temporary lusty “love” to break the barrier. I know i deserve no less than the love my father had for me. And i know what to look for, in a human, what to expect. He made me independent enough. Strong enough, not just physically, but mentally too.
Most people say, they feel incomplete without the love of their life, they feel depressed, or broken hearted, or “used”, when their “Persons” leave them, or break their trust. Like were you blind? Partially i feel, it’s their fault too, why were you in such a hurry to “fall” in love that they showed you some bullshit, and you thought it was love? And you lower your standards for them? Like, please higher your standard ladies/guys, you deserve more than that. More than just the facade.
My father trusted me, and he knew about my “opposite gender” friends, may be that’s why i never felt the need to hide, or cheat my parents trust. I was always taught to be honest in my doings, and sayings. And they did their part, of trusting me, and educating me in every step of my life. Making sure i learnt my lessons. They let me fight my battles, they let me get injured, but never left my side, they taught me to learn from my mistakes, from my injuries, and scars. It was never easy, but i came out strong. I made my friends, i chose them, some good, some bad, but from each of them, i learnt.
I was naturally taught to choose truth, love, kindness, and to stand up for what i believe in. And so i do.
The role my parents played in my life, was not just of a father, and a mother, it was also, a guide, counsellor, teacher, philosopher, and a friend.
I had my “teenage” mood swings too, but they stick with me through that too, they never raised their voices on me, neither did they let anyone.
I was never made to feel embarrassed, they praised me in front of everybody, and made me ponder, and explained me, my bads/wrong doings in secrecy.
For once, i remember my father scolding my brothers, but me? NEVER!! Not once. And people still feel i am an oppressed muslim girl child?
I made every decision for myself, i chose who i wanted to be, what i wanted, and what not. I am made of my own decisions, and understandings.
And to say the least, i am blessed, to have the right attitude, and thinking towards life, and people, and for knowing what’s right, wrong, and how people are affected by my decisions, and how to handle life, as it comes.
Did you find the irony in this? Me, a muslim, a girl child, was NEVER oppressed. I was raised by a King, like a princess, a soldier, and a brave girl, and hence i see no reason to search for princes.
About being oppressed, i can show “non muslim” “girls/boys” being oppresed, but i can also show you muslims girls/boys too.
So, No peeps, am pretty sure, it’s not about being a girl, or a boy, or being a muslim, or a hindu, or any other religious child, it’s about the company you have around you, how your parents raise you, to have your own mentality, perspective, and approach to life.
It’s about wrong-upbringing, wrong decisions, and wrong mentality; not wrong religion, wrong gender, or wrong relation.
-Aahilic Aish
Sorry, for the boring rant, but people needed to realize that.
Much love,
-Aahilic Aish
Aahilic Aish 